A Prairie Home Companion from American Public Media: First Person
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A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor

First Person
Privy
By Bruce Trice
October 24, 2007

Thick brown vines with leaves of bright green and yellow fall down the walls all around me.
I reach out to touch them
but they have no feeling.
The stone on the floor feels cool and damp beneath my bare feet.
And a large door beside me closes, shutting out all interruptions.
Now it is quiet.

Alone now and uneasy, I slowly, gently, take my seat.
Seeing the dim light around the corner,
I think I hear a familiar book calling out to me from behind and with an awkward twist, I reach out for it, while at the same time, a sweet aroma fills my nostrils—
It smells like springtime...in the fall.
How pleasant.
Opening the little leather bound to Chapter One,
I settle in to my good book.

A little fan whirs in the distance.
My eyes slowly close while I listen to the soft electronic purr of it's motor.

It is the only sound I hear when,
All of the sudden,
Out of nowhere,
I become relieved.

About the author:
I am a 45 year old 4th generation Arkansan, who became hooked on Garrison and his show while living in Colorado for just over 8 years, until I could stand it no more and moved home almost 9 years ago to the Land of Opportunity, where the kudzu runs free, where just looking at a pine tree can cause you to perspire and where my children can stand on the same ground that their great-great grandparents stood. Speaking of family, I am the father of 4 glorious daughters and 1 strapping son and I have been married to sweet Janice Kathryn for just over 21 years. I wrote this little ditty when my beloved in-laws were at my home, visiting all the way from Bozeman, Montana and I could find no quiet resting place in my moment of need. It's a good thing we bought the house right across the street from Uncle Bennett and Aunt Margie!



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