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FIFTH ANNUAL JOKE SHOW
Joke Submissions
Yo Mama
Jokes
Yo'mama is so fat when she puts
on a red dress people say,
"Hey Kool-Aid!"
Megan Massie, Princeton, WV
Age: 10
-Yo' mama's so fat, when her pager goes off people think she's backing
up
-Yo' mama's so dumb, it takes her an hour to cook Minute Rice
-Yo' mama's so dumb, she can't boil water without burning it
Lindsay Murphy, Bloomfield Hills, MI
Yo mama's so dumb, she thinks serial killers put poison in people's cornflakes!
Eileen Krasowski, New Haven, CT
Yo Mama's armpits are so hairy...it looks like she has Don King in a headlock.
Yo Mama's so ugly even the tide won't take her out.
Yo Mama's so poor she can't even afford to pay attention.
Darwin Irish, South Hadley, Ma
YO' MAMA IS SO FAT THAT SHE HAS HER OWN GRAVITATIONAL FIELD.
Stephen Meckler, Philadelphia, PA
Your Mama's so fat, if she won a beauty contest they'd sing, "Here she
comes, North America."
Sue Kanal, Critical, MASS
Yo mama's so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles!
Yo mama's so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
Ben Tanner, Clarkesville, GA
Q: So, who's the Japanese insult comedienne who married a former Secretary
of Agriculture?
A: Yomama Wazami-Butz.
Ken Shaw, Brooklyn, NY
Yo mama is so ugly that she has to trick or treat by phone!
Evan Galloway, Badin, NC
Yo' Momma's So Fat, she got a psychaitrist bill for 1500 dollars. 500
for the session and 1000 for a new couch!
Yo' Momma's So Dumb, when the movie sign "under 17 not admitted", she
went home and got 16 friends!
Yo' Momma's So Old, she owes Moses a quarter!
Yo' Momma's So Fat, If she wears and X-files Tee shirt, a helicopter lands
on her back!
Yo' Momma's So Dumb, She changed your diapers once a month, because it
said on the box, "Good for up to Twenty Pounds"
Josh Widdowson, Indiana, PA
Yo mamma so fat that when she runs the 50 yard dash she needs an overnight
bag.
Qwill O'Sullivan, Sheboygan, WI
Dear gang,
Your mama's teeth are so yella that when she smiles traffic slows down.
Jay Weaver, Chicago, Il
Yo Mama so fat when she takes a bath she makes gravy
Yo Mama so fat her shadow weighs 50 pounds
Bruce Tibbetts, Albuquerque, NM
yo mama----yo mama is so ugly that the hazardous waste people are scared
of her!!!!!!
Allison Krawiec, Elkhart, IN
Age: 8
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A national holiday in Lake Wobegon is always gaudy and joyful. But what is going on between Clint Bunsen and Miss Liberty?
Everyone is here—Pastor Ingqvist, the Sons of Knute, Sister Arvonne of Our Lady of Perpetual Responsibility and her ocarina band, the Norwegian bachelor farmers, Dorothy and the Chatterbox Café, Wally in the Sidetrack Tap—as crowds converge on the little town to celebrate American independence, even as the chairman of the event broods on the great question of the day: Shall we struggle on valiantly here or shall we burst the bonds and find beautiful life in the golden west?
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Scripts and bits from A Prairie Home Companion celebrate the secret society of men and women who possess excellent spelling and punctuation skills. (You know who you are.)
Selections include "The Six-Minute Hamlet," a tribute to Emily Dickinson, a Guy Noir adventure that exposes an MFA scam, a riveting "Professional Organization of English Majors" drama, and guests Billy Collins, Robert Bly, Roy Blount Jr., and Calvin Trillin.
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