Dear Garrison:
Whatever happened to your show sponsor, "Mournful
Oatmeal"? They were 2nd only to Rhurbarb Pie and we'd love
to hear them again. It's good to be reminded that you "aren't
as good as you thought!"
Sue White
Littleton,CO
Sue, I abandoned Mournful Oatmeal because
I started to
feel happy again. I had heart surgery and my daughter
became very entertaining and my wife said she was in
love with me and my son and daughter-in-law produced a
beautiful grandson, Frederick, and so the oatmeal got
put on the shelf. But there will come a time, and we’ll
bring it back. Maybe in November.
Hello Mr. Keillor,
I'm a bit embarrassed to ask this question, but here goes...
While you were growing up, did people call you "Garrison"
or did you have a nickname? Our third boy is due in a month
and we'd like to name him "Garrison", but my concern
is that everyone will call him "Gary" as a child,
and "Gary Reed" doesn't have such a nice sound to
it if you ask me.
Sincerely,
Elizabeth Pofahl Reed
Dear Elizabeth, My mother and father
named me Gary and I was Gary for years and years. In junior
high school, I took Garrison as a pen name, and came to like
it, but deep down in my heart (and to my family) I am still
Gary. I like the name Gary, and like it even more for having
abandoned it. I suppose it came from Gary Cooper. I don’t
know. But I feel that back there in my early teens, I took a
turn toward Garrison and I’m still curious about who Gary
is. I don’t recommend Garrison as a name for a child ----
I think that family names are the best, and traditional names.
I gave my daughter the middle name Grace, after my mother, and
my mother was so pleased.
Hey Garrison,
Are there no Italians in Lake Wobegon? The culture seems awfully
homogenous! Did none ever settle, or did they all move on to more
hospitable climes?
Al Rossi
Al, there are Italians in St. Paul who
did well here,
and some in Minneapolis, but Italians are a clannish people,
and you don ‘t find many in rural Minnesota. They didn’t
come here to become dairy farmers. It’s just the truth,
Al. I’m not responsible for the truth, it happened before
I was born. There were no Italians around where I grew up, and
so I don’t put them in my stories. I do, however, whenever
I visit little towns in Tuscany, feel that I am touching something
about the heart and soul of Lake Wobegon. I go to a place like
Cremona or Siena and go into a restaurant and the people are
friendly and the food is good and unpretentious and there is
an easiness and familiarity about life that is comforting to
me.
Dear Garrison,
I'm a 26-year-old native of Louisiana, who is about to graduate
from a local university with a degree in music. I've been considering
several graduate schools in the Midwest, including the University
of Minnesota. I have been told of the horror stories of ill-prepared
southerners, who venture out too far north and never heard from
again. Do you have any advice to put my fears to bed?
Tracy Bedgood
Ruston, Louisiana
Louisiana Tech University
Tracy, if you choose to come north,
and if you are adventurous and open-minded, you’ll find
music and music scholars in great abundance, a whole carnival
of stuff, of tremendous diversity and good quality, and you’ll
also find that Minnesotans are very charmed to know that you’re
from Louisiana. Of course winter is a challenge, just as summer
is a challenge in Louisiana, but it’s nothing that a person
can’t figure out. You might turn out to be one of those
undaunted southerners who discovers the joy of winter, which
is the joy of being outdoors and moving around, skiing or skating,
and keeping warm through exercise. Movement equals heat equals
tolerance of winter. And the landscape can be stunning then.
Absolutely magical. Do what you need to do, but if you choose
Minnesota, prepare for some sweet surprises. I absolutely recommend
that you attend a big Lutheran church, for the pleasure of congregational
singing, and that you go dancing at the Quest, where they have
a big Latin night, and that you go see the St. Paul Chamber
Orchestra. And if you want to come see our show, let me know.
Dear Mr. Keillor,
Since our move to semi-rural USA, I have begun raising chickens
and have been amazed at the wonderful things they can teach
one about the human condition. For example, the rooster struts
and does not much else but is quite willing to lay down his
life in front of a coyote or wild dog to save his hens. And,
we had a mean rooster once who kept attacking me in spite of
my repeated warnings. We had a public execution and the rest
of the chickens have marched in line since that time. Do any
of the folks in Lake Wobegon have chickens? They are great topics
for stories.
Joann Harry
Spring Hill, KS
Dear Joann, My family was very involved
with chickens right up to my generation. My grandma felt that
you couldn’t trust any butcher shop and so she always raised
her own meat, and many of her children felt likewise, and tried
to follow in her footsteps, but my cousins and I, I’m afraid,
are city people and we purchase chicken breasts wrapped in plastic
and that is all we know about chickens. I envy you your knowledge
of chickens. I grew up with them and had the job of catching
the chickens to be slaughtered. I ran around Grandma’s
farmyard with a hook made from a clotheshanger and snatched
chickens by the ankle and brought them to Dad who cut their
heads off. I wouldn’t be able to do this now. To me, now,
chicken breasts are not so different from scallops or tofu or
any other foodstuff. They’re just food, and I have no personal
experience with them, alas.
Dear Garrison,
Is there any significance in the fact that, aside from yourself,
the cast members on the show all have first names for last names
- Keith, Scott, and Russell?
Peter Cantamessa
Princeton, NJ
Dear Peter, You’ve forgotten Fred
Newman and Rich
Dworsky. And our new ingénue, Cantamessa Scott. She is
beautiful beyond belief and it’s hard to do a radio show
with her around, but we do our best.
Mr. Keillor:
My husband will be devastated when I tell him you are planning
to retire from PHC. Are you absolutely positive you want to
retire? There's no replacements out there...nobody even close.
What does Maia think?
Clare Vossen
Raleigh, NC
Dear Clare, There is no thought of retiring
here, so I don’t know where you got that news. I’m
just getting my second wind at PHC, and the staff and crew these
days is so inspiring to work with that I may continue for decades.
I work with all these young people who seem to think that the
show is a nice opportunity for them and that makes me want to
do a good show. We did our show in L.A. June 1st and the crew
had to start loading in at 3 a.m. for a 3 p.m. broadcast and
when I got there around noon, all of those people seemed so
happy, so up, and so we did the show, for about 6000 people
in the auditorium and whoever else was listening, and afterward
the crew seemed exalted by what had taken place ---- by Taj
Mahal, or by the great film singer Marni Nixon, or by the band,
or whatever ---- and that is the payoff for me. We all went
out to dinner afterward and stood around drinking wine and jabbering
and that’s my reward. My colleagues know how hard I work
on this show and I know how hard they work and when we are happy
with each other, then life is good.
