Dear Mr. Keillor,
What do you consider to be the essence of the uniqueness of your
talent? Is it your perspective on the ordinary? Or the keenness
of your pain? Or the deepness of your insecurities?
Sincerely,
Pete Hodge
Riverside, CA
Pete, the essence of the uniqueness of
my talent is the meekness of my ambition. I’m the least stage-struck
person who ever spent this long doing a show on stage. It never
was my dream. My dream was to play hockey and that didn’t work
out.
Garrison,
I'm 21 years old and I'm getting ready to spend 6 months walking
and hitching across America, with only a backpack. Do you have
any advice for my trip?
Hassan Haider
Dallas, TX
Hassan, hitch-hiking is tough these days
and that’s why you see so few people attempting it. You stand
there holding your little cardboard sign and trying to look pleasant,
clean, reverent, obedient, and after a thousand cars reject you,
it does start to weigh on your mind. And if you’re dark-complected,
or have odd hair, or are too tall, or are wet, forget about it.
I recommend a Greyhound bus. Less frustrating and you meet a higher
class of people. Or you can find drive-away cars. Even a bicycle
would be preferable, I think.
Garrison,
My parents are about to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary.
They have been listening to PHC for a long time. My siblings and
I are at a loss how to celebrate this momentous occasion. Dining
out is awkward and they always overcook the fish. A party is out
of the question. What should we do?
Knut, Arne, Ingrid, Ellen, and Lisa
Find a nice café with a private room and
reserve it, and invite your parents’ pals ---- not too many, just
the good ones ---- and put on a surprise party. And then each
of you stand up and give a little speech of gratitude for those
two folks who got together back then and what came of it. Sweet
and simple. And then present them with a nice symbolic gift.
Mr. Keillor:
In the December 2 issue of “The New Yorker" Joe Klein writes that
the Democratic Party has "National Public Radio tendencies." I
have no idea what these tendencies are. Do you have any ideas
on this? I hope your long experiences with MPR, The New Yorker
magazine, and politics, will help enlighten this mystery.
Gary
New York
Gary, I suppose that he’s using NPR as
a synonym for “elitist,” which I suppose NPR is, and so are both
political parties, except they have to go to great trouble to
hide it.
Dear Garrison,
What's up with your intense dislike of Christmas fruitcake and
"The Little Drummer Boy?" Was there an "incident" in your childhood
involving them?
Yours,
Rob
I don’t want to talk about it, Rob.
Okay? Please don’t bring it up again. I hate to be unpleasant
about this, but if you ask me again, I’m going to throw a fit.
Dear Mr. Keillor,
Recently, a heated and sustained debate began to rage through
our normally mild- mannered office regarding the pronunciation
of the name of the Capital of South Dakota. Please tell us the
truth, is “peer” or is “pea-yair” really the way to pronounce
the name of the capital of South Dakota?
Bruce, Abbe, Ket, Nosek, Wayne, Nelson and Colleen
Pierre, it’s pronounced Peer. That’s the
truth. But the hero of Tolstoy’s “War and Peace” would be pronounced
Pea-yair, even in Peer, by Peereans.
Dear Garrison,
I am a 20 year old college student from Alabama. You are a huge
inspiration on my deciding on English as a major. Is there ever
a chance that your show will be broadcast on television again?
Michael Thompson
Walnut Grove, AL.
Michael, I don’t think it will be, but
of course if anyone wanted to do it, we’d say yes. I think it
looks sort of cool on TV. I see it sometimes on a backstage monitor.
Of course when I do, that means that I’m not on stage, and maybe
that’s why it looks cool.
