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Bertha's Kitty Boutique GK:....brought to you by Bertha's Kitty Boutique. (MEOW) It's not easy being a cat and having to poop in a box (EMBARRASSED MEOW) and drink water out of a toilet (CAT NAUSEA) and eating tuna that you know is not fit for human consumption (RETCHING)---- GK: Think about it. Maybe you've been a little tough on Puff lately...and it is Mother's Day and when was the last time Puff saw its mother? (MEOW) Did you ever help Puff try to re-establish contact? (MEOW) No, you didn't. Why not? (MEOW) And the other little guys in Puff's litter ---- Snowball and Pookie and Chuckles and the Great Catsby ---- where are they today? (MEOW) Do they have kids? Are they neutered? Are they living on the street somewhere? (MEOW) Puff has a lot on his mind and maybe you've been emotionally distant when he needed your support ---- cats can sense that ---- (MEOW) and what better way to make up than with a jar of Alaskan King Salmon Caviar from Bertha's ---- (CAT INTEREST) a couple ounces of fresh pink salmon eggs--- twist off the cover and that catatonic cat will catwalk for joy (CAT SINGING) --- and now it's reduced in price, too. Isn't that right, Tim Russell--- TR: That's right. Alaskan King Salmon Caviar is now marked down from $121 per two ounce jar ---- to $114 ---- that's only fifty seven dollars per ounce. GK: Hard to beat that price. TR: That's right. Alaskan King Salmon Caviar is now marked down from $121 per two ounce jar ---- to $114 ---- that's only fifty seven dollars per ounce. GK: And isn't your cat worth it? (MEOW) Of course he is. CF: You're very important to me, Puff, and that's why we need to work out our hard feelings. (CAT PURR) You hungry? (CAT INTEREST) I've got a surprise for you in the cupboard....(CAT INTEREST).... GK: Alaskan King Salmon Caviar from Bertha's Kitty Boutique...... TR: Now marked down to only fifty seven dollars per ounce. GK: Remember, no man stands so tall as when he stoops to feed a cat. (MEOW) © 1996 Garrison Keillor
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Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
Read the first chapter»Signed Copies Available»
The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
Order now!»