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Fred Farrell GK: . . . Brought to you by Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to animal calls. (JUNGLE MONKEYS, BIRDS) TR: This is Fred Farrell. How do you get people's attention in a city like New York? Calling a taxi for example. (TK: HEY!) Yelling doesn't work and neither does (TK; WHISTLE) whistling. But maybe this will. (ELEPHANT CALL) See? (CAR BRAKES). Or how about car alarms? There are car alarms going off twenty times a minute ---- one more isn't going to scare anybody off. No way. But maybe this will. (TK VICIOUS DOG BARKING) An electronic dog. But how about muggers? You're walking down a dark street and somebody comes up behind you ---- a whistle is no deterrent, but maybe this is (APE). At Fred Farrell, we can teach you how to make that orangutan call yourself while jumping up and down with your arms hanging at your sides. (APE) Statistics show that muggers never bother with crazy people. (APE). Order your New York trifecta call (ELEPHANT, VICIOUS DOG, APE) and get my twelve-in-one animal call --- cockatoo (SFX), Mongoose (SFX), rooster (SFX), baboon (SFX), Goose (SFX), Moose (SFX), Appaloosa (SFX), tortoise (SFX), porpoise (SFX), opossum (SFX), ostrich (SFX), and Boston bull terrier (SFX). GK: Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to animal calls (JUNGLE MEDLEY) © 1996 BY GARRISON KEILLOR |
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Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
Read the first chapter»Signed Copies Available»
The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
Order now!»