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Ketchup: Shampoo TR: That's my family. My brothers Bernie and Danny, my sister Becky. Still kinda close, we four, just like in the old days, especially at the holidays. We always get together and it's always wonderful, the closeness, the traditions. And this year I noticed something wrong. Something wrong with their hair. SS: What is it, Buddy? I sense that something's amiss. Has a rift appeared between us? TR: I feel as close to you as ever, Becky. And that's why I can say this. Your hair is dull and dingy. I'm afraid that if you don't do something about it, Al may leave you for a cocktail waitress. SS: But I use an expensive shampoo and conditioning rinse, Buddy. It's made from aloe and tarragon and oregano and celery root and garlic and.... TR: Those things can never get your hair sparkly clean the way ketchup can, Becky. SS: Ketchup? But---- TR: Mom always used it when she washed your hair, Becky. Always. SS: That was ketchup? I thought I was having a brain hemmorhage. TR: Here, Becky. A bottle of ketchup shampoo. For the old times. SS: Thanks, Buddy. And--- thanks for being able to tell me. TR: It isn't easy to say "I love you" but there's no better way than with ketchup. Ketchup shampoo and conditioner, ketchup vinaigrette salad dressing, ketchup room freshener, and more than four hundred other fine ketchup products. GK: A message from the Ketchup Advisory Board. © 1996 BY GARRISON KEILLOR AND RICH PROCTER |
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Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
Read the first chapter»Signed Copies Available»
The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
Order now!»