Niagra
Saturday, May 16, 1998
Listen

....back right after this message.

(PIANO)

TR: For years I haven't been able to cry and I've missed it and I've felt---- I've felt like less of a man because of it ---- and now, thanks to Niagara.....(HE BREAKS DOWN)

SS: Thanks to a simple drug called Niagara, Bill can cry again.

TR (CRYING): I can cry again.

SS: And suddenly life seems fuller and richer.

TR (CRYING): Yes, it does.

SS: Niagara. Ask your doctor. Use only as directed. Long-term side effects may include loss of hair on ankles (TR REACTS WEEPILY TO EACH ITEM IN LIST), testiness, graying of hair, occasional memory loss, abnormal growth of eyebrows, stiffness in joints, slowness or hesitation of movement, inability to hold water, loss of interest in sex.

TR: What?

SS: Loss of interest in sex.

TR: Oh no. (SOBBING)

SS: Let me tell you about this other pill we have for that. (MUSIC)

GK: Niagara. From Buffalo Pharmaceuticals.

(c) 1998 by Garrison Keillor

Old Sweet Songs: A Prairie Home Companion 1974-1976

Old Sweet Songs

Lovingly selected from the earliest archives of A Prairie Home Companion, this heirloom collection represents the music from earliest years of the now legendary show: 1974–1976. With songs and tunes from jazz pianist Butch Thompson, mandolin maestro Peter Ostroushko, Dakota Dave Hull and the first house band, The Powdermilk Biscuit Band (Adam Granger, Bob Douglas and Mary DuShane).

Available now»

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