APHC: Saturday, April 24, 1999

Ketchup Advisory Board
Saturday, April 24, 1999
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(GK: Garrison Keillor, SS: Sue Scott, TK: Tom Keith, TR: Tim Russell, RD: Rich Dworsky)

Tonight's show is brought to you by the Ketchup Advisory Board.

TR: These are the good years for me and Barb. I found a really good breath spray that seems to have cleared up the problem and now I'm getting invited to meetings again. The tax refund came and we used it to de-worm the dog and as a result he passed Barb's wedding ring that he swallowed a couple weeks ago. And Barb's brother phoned and said they're not visiting this summer after all. So it looked like things were starting to look up for us, and then I come home from work to find Barb with her head in the freezer eating rocky road ice cream right out of the carton. With a serving spoon. - Barb, what's wrong?

SS: I was just looking at pictures from our romantic weekend getaway in Cannon Falls, Jim.

TR: What about it?

SS: I can't believe that's me -

TR: What's wrong?

SS: I look so old, so fat - so blank -

TR: Now that you mention it - there is a kind of vacancy about you -

SS: I need to lose weight, and do something about my hair. And then I need to take some courses at the University of Minnesota.

TR: Sounds like a plan.

SS: There's so much I need to know, Jim. About critical methodology and cultural pluralism and the Ming dynasty and the work of regulatory agencies and macroeconomics. I've never studied macroeconomics, Jim. I'm forty-eight years old and I don't understand macroeconomics.

TR: So many people go through life and never realize they don't understand macroeconomics, Barb. You're one of the lucky ones.

SS: It's spring, Jim. I'm going to go back to the U and make up all of those incompletes from my junior year and graduate at last.

TR: That's good.

SS: From now on, I'm going to let the housekeeping go and just live life to the fullest.

TR: And don't forget about the ketchup.

SS: That's the secret of the good life, isn't it - getting enough ketchup.

TR: Because ketchup has natural mellowing agents that help take the sting out of life's disappointments.

SS: Don't you think some ketchup would taste awfully good right now? I do.

(KETCHUP SONG)

RD: Ballet and painting and the operas of Rossini
Flowers and red wine and pesto and linguini
Good things are flowing like ketchup on a weenie

GK: Ketchup. For the good times.

RD: Ketchup....ketchup.....

On July 4th, help us celebrate the 35th Anniversary of A Prairie Home Companion and the Fourth of July with a free live nationally broadcast show from Avon, MN.

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From Garrison Keillor:
“When I was 16, Helen Fleischman assigned me to memorize Shakespeare’s Sonnet No. 29, ‘When in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes, I all alone beweep my outcast state’ for English class, and fifty years later, that poem is still in my head. Algebra got washed away, and geometry and most of biology, but those lines about the redemptive power of love in the face of shame are still here behind my eyeballs, more permanent than my own teeth. The sonnet is a durable good. These 77 of mine include sonnets of praise, some erotic, some lamentations, some street sonnets and a 12-sonnet cycle of months. If anything here offends, I beg your pardon, I come in peace, I depart in gratitude.”

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Robin & Linda Williams are among the most popular guest performers of A Prairie Home Companion (they also appeared in the movie, have performed as part of the The Hopeful Gospel Quartet, and made appearances as Marvin & Mavis Smiley). This CD features some of the duo's best harmonies from the show. Among the 12 tracks are familiar fan favorites, including "For Better or Worse", "Visions of Mother and Dad", "Tied Down, Home Free" and the title track. A collection that is muy bueno!

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