 |
Twelve Days of Christmas
Saturday, December 23, 2000
Listen
GK: On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me a (PARTRIDGE)
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
On the third day of Christmas, my true love sent to me three (WOOFS)
GK: What's that?
TK: That's what your true love sent.
GK: Dogs? I was supposed to get three French hens.
TK: No, you got three German shepherds.
GK: There's got to be a mistake.
TK: I'm only the messenger.
GK: On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me, four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me
FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
Four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
GK: On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me six (GEESE)---
FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
Four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me
(SWANS SWIMMING)
Six (GEESE)
FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
Four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Eight (MAIDS A MILKING)
Seven (SWANS SWIMMING)
Six (GEESE SNORING)
FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
Four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
GK: Hey, aren't those French hens there?
TK: What? These? (CHICKEN)
GK: Those are French hens. Let me trade my three German shepherds for three of those French hens. (GROWL) Easy, boy. Easy.
TK: These aren't French hens. (CHICKEN) These are chickens from Wisconsin (CHICKEN). Over here----- (FOOTSTEPS) This is a French hen. (ROOSTER CROW IN FRENCH) Sorry. Wrong bird. (FOOTSTEPS) This is a French hen (CHICKEN WITH FRENCH ACCENT).
GK: Three of them, please. And you can take these German shepherds. (WOOFS, OFF)
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me Twelve (DRUMMERS DRUMMING)
Eleven (PIPERS PIPING)
Ten (LORDS A LEAPING)
Nine (LADIES DANCING)
Eight (MAIDS A MILKING)
Seven (SWANS A SWIMMING)
Six (GEESE A LAYING )
FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
four (CALLING BIRDS)
Three (WOOFS)
Two (TURTLE DOVES)
And a (PARTRIDGE)
(c) 2000 by Garrison Keillor
|
|
|
|
Sign up here for our weekly e-pistle about what's happening at A Prairie Home Companion! Heck, while you're there, sign up for the daily e-mail from The Writer's Almanac too
A national holiday in Lake Wobegon is always gaudy and joyful. But what is going on between Clint Bunsen and Miss Liberty?
Everyone is here—Pastor Ingqvist, the Sons of Knute, Sister Arvonne of Our Lady of Perpetual Responsibility and her ocarina band, the Norwegian bachelor farmers, Dorothy and the Chatterbox Café, Wally in the Sidetrack Tap—as crowds converge on the little town to celebrate American independence, even as the chairman of the event broods on the great question of the day: Shall we struggle on valiantly here or shall we burst the bonds and find beautiful life in the golden west?
|
Scripts and bits from A Prairie Home Companion celebrate the secret society of men and women who possess excellent spelling and punctuation skills. (You know who you are.)
Selections include "The Six-Minute Hamlet," a tribute to Emily Dickinson, a Guy Noir adventure that exposes an MFA scam, a riveting "Professional Organization of English Majors" drama, and guests Billy Collins, Robert Bly, Roy Blount Jr., and Calvin Trillin.
|
|
|
