American Duct Tape Council
Saturday, February 10, 2001

(GK: Garrison Keillor, TR: Tim Russell, SS: Sue Scott, TK: Tom Keith)

.....after a word from the American Duct Tape Council. (DUCKS)


GK: So much to do around the house in cold weather and you know if you did all these odd jobs according to the textbook, you'd never have time for anything else. That leak in the upstairs bathroom, for example ----- (RIP TAPE) you wrap about fifty feet of duct tape around it and set a pail under it and you're covered. Cold air coming through a gap between the storm window and the frame (RIP TAPE) ---- cover it up with duct tape. Mice coming in through a gap under the front door? (RIP TAPE) Tape that front door closed and use the back door. Front walk need shoveling? Just put your right arm in a sling made of duct tape and watch for your neighbor to come out---- and then make a pitiful attempt to shovel with your left hand. (TR: You need some help? TK: No, I'm okay. TR: What's wrong with your arm? TK: They don't know. TR: They don't know. TK: They have no idea. TR: Let me do it. Please. ) Life is too short to spend it on maintenance. Did you know that with two out of three home chores, duct tape makes it easier? And that the third one doesn't matter. Duct's almost just about the only thing you need sometimes, duct tape. (DUCKS) A message from the American Duct Tape Council.

(c) 2001 by Garrison Keillor

Old Sweet Songs: A Prairie Home Companion 1974-1976

Old Sweet Songs

Lovingly selected from the earliest archives of A Prairie Home Companion, this heirloom collection represents the music from earliest years of the now legendary show: 1974–1976. With songs and tunes from jazz pianist Butch Thompson, mandolin maestro Peter Ostroushko, Dakota Dave Hull and the first house band, The Powdermilk Biscuit Band (Adam Granger, Bob Douglas and Mary DuShane).

Available now»

American Public Media © |   Terms and Conditions   |   Privacy Policy