|
NRA GK:....back right after this message from the National Rifle
Association. (MUSIC) SS: Here at the public library, we sometimes have to deal with
people who are upset about overdue notices and I just feel a little better
with my Smith and Wesson .44 magnum in my desk drawer, that's all. Shhhhh.
(MUSIC UNDER.....) GK: People you'd never guess were gun owners. People you see every
day. TR: I've worked at Starbucks for a year and never been physically threatened
yet, but I just feel safer with Mr. Samuel Colt here in my apron pocket.
I like to use the barrel to stir in the mocha. People get real quiet,
real fast. SS: I teach ballet and when we come to October and it's time to
announce which of our little pupils will be in "The Nutcracker"
and which ones will be ushering, things get a little tense with the pupils'
mothers who sometimes have a distorted view of their children's talent,
and somehow it calms them down to see this big bulge in the waistband
of my leotard. GK: The Second Amendment applies to everybody, kindergarten teachers,
symphony violinists, even soccer moms. SS: I love soccer except for the stupid parents who scream at
the ref and just the other day he called Megan for tripping ---- she wasn't
anywhere near the other girl ---- and she was upset about it and that's
when I got my little friend here. (CLICK OF HAMMER, SPIN) GK: A message from the National Rifle Association, protecting
your right to own rifles (SFX), pistols (SFX), bow and arrow (SFX), bazookas
(SFX), mortars (SFX), rocket launchers (SFX), guided missiles (SFX), Stealth
bombers (SILENCE), and cauldrons of boiling oil (POURING, SCREAM). © Garrison Keillor 2002 |
Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
Read the first chapter»Signed Copies Available»
The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
Order now!»