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Ketchup Advisory Board GK:…brought to you by the Ketchup Advisory Board. (MUSIC)
SS: These are the good years for Jim and me. Our son is in a program
where they treat testosterone poisoning with herbal tea and he seems to
be doing well. Our daughter has finally gotten her Bachelor of Fine Arts
degree in spatter painting and beadwork, so---- we should have been happy.
And then last week I found Jim with his head in the refrigerator. ----
What are you doing, honey? TR: Barb, there are ruthless forces at work in our refrigerator
---- chemical and biological entities --- and I'm adopting a new pre-emptive
strategy toward micro-organisms. Bacteria. Bacilli. Call it what you will.
I've been as patient as I could be and now is the time to take action.
SS: Do you see any signs of bacteria? Is something moving in there? TR: Barb, the absence of proof is not proof of absence. To wait
until we see evidence is to run a risk I am not willing to run. SS: Are you talking about the blue cheese, Jim? TR: I'm not free to disclose exactly what I'm talking about, I
just want you to know that starting today, I am taking over the refrigerator.
And at a time of my choosing, I'm going to spray it with two gallons of
windshield washer fluid. SS: Jim, that's crazy. You're going to ruin the cheese. TR: There will be some collateral damage in the cheese and meat
tray, yes. I don't deny that. And now I'm going to take just two more
questions---- SS: Jim, I think you've been watching too much CNN. TR: I am not going to stand by and watch this household destroyed
by salmonella. Barb, there are the known unknowns, the things we know
we don't know, and the known knowns, such as that the world will always
welcome lovers as time goes by. And this is one of the unknown unknowns,
things we don't know we don't know. SS: And then there are the unknown knowns, or things we know but
we've forgotten. Honey, put down the windshield washer. You know what
your problem is? You're not getting enough catchup. TR: You sure the catchup is okay? SS: The catchup is fine. And catchup contains natural mellowing
agents that live sensibly and steer a steady course and not throw the
baby out with the bath. What do you say I make you a little catchup sandwich?
TR: Okay. RD (SINGS): These are the good times, springtime in St. GK: Ketchup. For the good times. RD (SINGS): Ketchup…..Ketchup….. GK: A message from the Ketchup Advisory Board. © Garrison Keillor 2003 |
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Singer and songwriter Andra Suchy talks about singing duets with Garrison, and her latest album, Little Heart.
Old Sweet Songs: A Prairie Home Companion 1974-1976
Lovingly selected from the earliest archives of A Prairie Home Companion, this heirloom collection represents the music from earliest years of the now legendary show: 1974–1976. With songs and tunes from jazz pianist Butch Thompson, mandolin maestro Peter Ostroushko, Dakota Dave Hull and the first house band, The Powdermilk Biscuit Band (Adam Granger, Bob Douglas and Mary DuShane).
