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Explosives SS: As a woman, I feel that the new law discriminates against
us because ---- face it, most women aren't good shots. My years of volunteer
work in the schools never gave me the chance to learn how to lock and
load and take aim and fire. And so I say that women should have the right
to carry grenades. If someone drives up alongside my car on I-94 waving
a pistol at me, I need an equalizer, and that's a hand grenade. I just roll down my window, flip him the bird, get the grenade out of
my briefcase, yank the pin, count to three, ein zwei drei, and toss it
in his passenger side, and he's toast. Grenades are safer; they don't
travel as far. You don't accidentally kill some little kid a half mile
away, you only kill the people you want to kill, the ones in that car
who waved the gun at you. People who are poor shots should be allowed to carry grenades, and if
you don't agree, we're going to hurt you. It's as simple as that. TR: Message prepared and paid for by W.I.F.E., Women in Favor
of Explosives. © Garrison Keillor 2003 |
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Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
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The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
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