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Ketchup Advisory Board THEME GK:... brought to you by the Ketchup Advisory Board. SS: These are the good years for Jim and me. Spring has come and
we had the house fumigated which pretty much took care of the lice problem
and we've been enjoying more leisure time since we decided to embrace
the concept of Natural Landscaping As Practiced By Native Peoples. Our
lawn is all rocks and thistle and buckthorn, and it's perfectly nice,
and the neighbors don't seem to be as angry as they were last fall at
that meeting where we said a lot about freedom that maybe we could have
said more tactfully. And hiring the attorney was a bad idea. Speaking
of which, Jim Junior is now celebrating 14 days of sobriety and his parole
officer says he is doing fine and our daughter has recovered from that
horrible accident when she got picked up by the giant magnet on the crane
at the steel salvage yard - it just grabbed hold of the metal on her face
and she was traumatized, but she's fine now, and so are we, and the other
day I said to Jim: There's something about you that seems different. I
don't know. Tranquil. At peace with yourself. TR: Well, it's summer. SS: You look so--- at ease. TR: Maybe it's because I'm not reading our monthly statement from
the mutual fund. SS: Your hair seems more relaxed. What's going on? TR: Nothing. (PAUSE) Well---- SS: What? What is it? TR: I've been shampooing with ketchup, Barb. SS: Ketchup! TR: Ketchup has natural mellowing agents which are easily absorbed
by the hair roots, and they go directly to the brain and the cerebral
cortex. I've never felt better. SS: And red hair looks good on you. RD (SINGS): These are the good times, spring is in the air. GK: Ketchup. For the good times. RD (SINGS): Ketchup….ketchup. © Garrison Keillor 2003 |
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Now Available:
A Christmas Blizzard
GK's New Holiday Story
A comic novella about a Hawaii-bound holiday traveler who ends up stranded in his North Dakota hometown.
Audio edition also available»
The Prairie Home cruise has become legendary on two of the Seven Seas and now is setting sail on a third, a weeklong spring break cruise of the western Caribbean along the Mexican coast, and it leaves March 14 from Tampa.
Stories of a Wobegon romance far from home, all delivered with Garrison Keillor's trademark humor.
Read the first chapter»Signed Copies Available»
The latest collection of Lake Wobegon short stories gathered from live broadcasts include Confirmation Sunday, the church directory photos, Pastor Ingqvist's leather bound sermons along with song lyrics and the "95 Theses," among others. Companion audio also available.
Order now!»