A Prairie Home Companion: October 18, 2003

Snake Jacket
Saturday, October 18, 2003
Listen

GK: ......this portion of our show brought to you by Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to wildlife products.

TR (FRED): This is Fred Farrell. If you live in the Midwest, and by the looks of you I'd say you do, then you know that all this stuff about the joys of living in a place with four seasons is a bunch of horse hocky, all it means is you freeze your keester, but now at least there's an all-season jacket so you stay warm in winter without sweating like a pig in October, and that's this Copperhead Car Coat. Thanks to the miracle of bio-engineering, this coat is made of live copperhead snakeskin genetically selected for durability and weatherproofing. The Copperhead is the first car coat that sheds layers in the summer and grows new ones in the winter. Rips and tears? No problems, the living snake tissue in the jacket repairs itself, and all you need to do is once a week you put this little white rodent (SQUEAKS) under your left arm and hold it there until it dissolves. The coat requires no more maintenance than that. Sometimes the hood may tighten on your head and you may hear gurgling sounds ---- just whack it with a crowbar until it lets go. Order your snakeskin jacket this week and get, absolutely free, one of my six-in-one grow-your-own animal pellets ---- tree toad (SFX), wood duck (SFX), snow goose (SFX), mountain goat (SFX), sea gull (SFX), and sea lion (SFX) all in one tiny pellet.

GK: That's Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to wildlife products. (MONKEY, JUNGLE BIRDS)