A Prairie Home Companion: May 29, 2004

Cicada Intro and Song
Saturday, May 29, 2004
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We are plagued by cicadas tonight here at Wolf Trap. Planes are coming over at low altitude (SFX) and dropping thousands of fruit bats (SFX) who are going after the cicadas (BATS SWOOPING) and ushers are going after them with tennis racquets (SWISHING, SHOUTING) and also attacking them with espresso machines (SFX). Cicadas are driving Washingtonians crazy. (CHAINSAW WAVING) There are Forest Rangers going after them with chainsaws and also with Chihuahuas (SFX) and trying to confuse the cicadas with hairdryers (SFX) and going after them with laser swords (SFX) and air wrenches (SFX).

Cicada (Lyrics)

O the seventeen-year cicada it crawls out of the ground
It has no self-esteem issues, no identity to be found
It does not go into personal counseling for months
It's only job is to have sex and it only does it once

The cicada crawls out of the ground and it climbs up on a limb
And he looks around for her and she discovers him
They do not sit discussing old loves of days gone by
It's wham bam and thank you ma'am and now it's time to die

It doesn't take much data to be a cicada

If we were like cicadas there'd be no politics at all
We'd just wake up one morning and climb up a wall
There'd be this lovely high-pitched music in the air
And we would get a lovely thrill and then just not be there.

The Rapture Baptists are waiting for, with no suffering or tears
The cicada gets something like that about every 17 years.
No philosophy, no economics, just demand and supply.
Was it good for you? It was good for me. And now it's time to die.