Saturday, September 2, 2006
GK: .....after a word from the Ketchup Advisory Board.
TR: These are the good years for Barb and me. We made our annual visit to the State Fair and I spent a few hours in the Mining Industry Building and learned a lot about the properties of limestone. And Barb won a free aluminum storm door by guessing the number of ping-pong balls in a chest of drawers. So it was a productive visit. We got a free yardstick and some feed caps and a lot of interesting reading materials to put in the bathroom----- We should have been happy. But the next morning I came downstairs for breakfast one morning and found Barb melting two pounds of butter in the microwave. Barb-what are you doing?
SS: I'm making you toast on a stick, Jim. See?
TR: Barb . Toast doesn't need to be on a stick. It's fine as it is.
SS: Just try it. Here's your toast and now you just dip it in the melted butter.
SS: What, Jim?
TR: There's a reason the State Fair only happens once a year.
SS: What do you mean, Jim?
TR: The State Fair is not a way of life. It's a reward for making it through the summer. Sort of like ice cream is a reward for eating your broccoli.
SS: I never serve broccoli, Jim. You eat ice cream every night.
TR: It was a bad analogy, Barb. But the point is still valid. Summer is over, Barb. It's time to go back to using knives and forks.
SS: Oh, Jim. That's so sad.
TR: Eating with your fingers is fine in the summer when food is plentiful. But when things freeze up, you need a knife and fork to defend your food against predators.
SS: You make it sound like we're animals.
TR: We are animals. And ketchup helps to bring out our powerful animal instincts. Because it looks like blood.
SS: Oh Jim.
TR: Civilization is fine in warm weather, Barb, but when it gets cold, life comes down to the basics. Getting food. And mating. (HE HOWLS)
SS: Oh Jim. I haven't seen you like this since---- I don't know when. I'll go get the ketchup right now.
These are the good times
The singing of the birds
The grandeur of nature, of feelings beyond words,
Life is flowing like ketchup on cheese curds.
GK: Ketchup, for the good times
RD: Ketchup, ketchup