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SFX script
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Listen
GK: This was the week North Korea set off a nuclear bomb, which you shouldn't worry about because our government is monitoring the situation very closely from a secret bunker in North Dakota and I believe if we punch in the PIN number I have here --- (SLOW DIGITAL BEEPS) --- we'll be able to get into the CIA's monitor circuit and listen in to the government as it listens to the North Koreans ---- (WIND) yes, it's North Dakota ---- and (STATIC / TUNES IN) you can hear a CIA agent tuning in the gigantic dish ---- aiming it so it is focused on the nuclear test site in North Korea---- this is a gigantic dish about half a mile wide and a hundred yards high ---- they can hear every move Kim Jong Il makes. They just need to tune this thing in. (THRESHING MACHINE) There's somebody threshing wheat. (TUNING) (BIG ENGINE, RUMBLING) Sounds like sugar beet harvest. (TRUCK, LOADING OF BEETS) And they're loading them into trucks. Let's see what else.(SHEEP) ---- sounds like Wyoming. (OIL WELL PUMPING) Oil well.
SS: Oh baby---- oh my gosh----
TR: Oh Rhonda---- oh god---- oh I've waited so long for this(MORE ECSTASY)
GK: Sounds like Wyoming, still.
SS: Oh that feels so good. Oh my gosh. Oh Eddie.
TR: Who's that coming?
SS: Don't stop. Don't stop. Keep going. Yes, Yes. Yes.
GK: Okay we'll need to fine tune this a little. (CHAINSAW, TREE FALLING) Northern California. (COWS) Marin County. And (FOGHORN) Point Reyes. (WHALES) Sounds like the humpbacks are migrating. (HAWAIIAN MUSIC) Sounds like we have the Hawaiian islands there and (SURF GULLS) ----- yeah, that's Hawaii ----- (SHIP HORN) Sounds like a cruise ship. Well, we're getting closer to the Korean peninsula. (BOOTS MARCHING). This sounds like the palace guard at Kim Jong Il's place. And (MOVIE PROJECTOR) the Dear Leader is fond of Hollywood movies. (HORSE WHINNY) He's watching a western, sounds like. (TR KOREAN, LIKE JOHN WAYNE) A John Wayne western, overdubbed into Korean. (TR MORE KOREAN, A LA JOHN, AND GUNSHOTS) Well, I guess that's where he got the idea of the nuclear explosion.
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