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Café Boeuf script
Saturday, May 2, 2009
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(PIANO)
GK: this portion of the show brought to you by the Café Boeuf Nashville, where the elite meet to eat...
(RESTAURANT AMBIENCE)
(FAST FOOTSTEPS)
TR: (EXUBERANT FRENCH)
GK: Antoine— please. Don’t.
TR (FRENCH): What? You do not wish me to kiss you on both cheeks?
GK: No.
TR (FRENCH): But monsieur. I am French—
GK: Look. You’ve kissed me on the cheek before and it was very nice but we’re moving on, now, okay?
TR (FRENCH):Very well. Then cordial greetings, monsieur, and my sincere respects to your family and those whom you permit to be intimate with your cheeks.
GK: Thank you, Antoine.
TR (FRENCH): Come, I have saved for you a table in a secluded corner spot. (FOOTSTEPS)
GK: The café is busy tonight.
TR (FRENCH): Yes, people of Nashville are discovering French cooking and learning not to fear the unusual ingredient.
GK: Oh good. Unusual ingredients like what?
TR (FRENCH): The (FRENCH PHRASE, “LE COQ”)—
GK: It’s something about chicken, right. The kidneys? The gall bladder? The lungs?
TR (FRENCH): Chicken feet. Boiled chicken feet with the (FRENCH).
GK: Oh good grief....
TR (FRENCH): You eat the fingers of the chicken, why not the feet?
GK: I’d like the boeuf, please.
TR (FRENCH): You are passing up a work of art — a (FRENCH).
GK: A beef. Medium.
TR (FRENCH): Chicken feet de Provence, with prune pate between the toes and a gentle mist of coriander.
GK: Beef.
TR (FRENCH): A taste. Please.
GK: Beef steak.
TR (FRENCH): It is on the house.
GK: Let go of my shoulder.
TR (FRENCH): Okay. No chicken feet. Instead, I bring you the (FRENCH)
GK: Beef. Well done.
TR (FRENCH): I insist. (FRENCH)
GK: It’s tripe, isn’t it.
TR (FRENCH): Brains. Fried brains of the chicken. It’s beautiful. (FRENCH)
GK: Steak.
(PIANO)
GK: That’s the Café Boeuf. Where the elite meet to eat.
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