SFX, March 26, 2011
Ryman Auditorium in Nashville, TN
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GK: Spring is here, sort of ---- it comes in fits and starts ---- you have a sunny day (BIRDS) and people are out riding their bicycles (BIKE, HORN) and the next day the temperature falls 38 degrees and there’s a sleet storm (SFX), and there is nothing colder than icy rain. Snow looks cold, but rain is colder. I have been in North Dakota in January and I felt colder in northern Florida in a rainstorm. (THUNDER, LIGHTNING) But the sun comes out again and you get to work, untaping the windows (SFX) and scraping out the gutters (SFX) and cleaning the windows (SPRITZ, WIPE) and the bear wakes up who was hibernating under the porch (SFX) and he’s dazed and confused, so you put him in the car (SFX) and you head for the woods to drop him off and (THUMP, SPLASH) you hit a pothole and it splashes your windshield and you turn on your wipers and (SFX) that just spreads the dirty water around—and you’re out of windshield washer fluid (STRAINS) and meanwhile (THUMP, CRUNCH) you hit a pothole and now your transmission is out of whack (SFX) and it sounds bad and meanwhile the bear has crawled into the front seat with you (SFX) and now the seat belt alarm is going (SFX) so you pull over (ANGRY HONKS, PASSING) and you buckle up the bear (SFX) and you drive in to the gas station, and the mechanic listens to the engine -----

FN: That’ll be 800 dollars. By the way, you got a bear in your car.

GK: 800 bucks? For what?

FN: Bearings.

GK: 800 bucks just for bearings?

FN: Bearings are pricey. Black bearings are. Plus you need new tires. The tires are bare.

GK: So it’s 800 bucks, huh?

FN: That’s right. I’ll toss in a free car wash.

GK: Okay. So he puts your car up on the hoist (SFX) and he replaces your black bearings (PNEUMATIC WRENCH), and takes off your tires (PNEUMATIC WRENCH), and puts on new ones (PNEUMATIC WRENCH) then he fixes the dent in the back door where someone slid into you during the blizzard (BANGING) and then he lowers your car (SFX) and into the car wash you go—first the rinse (SFX) and then the soap (SFX), and then the rainbow foam (SFX), and then another rinse (SFX), and then through the blow dryers (SFX), and then the detailers come in on the other side with the vacuum (SFX) and they shampoo the bear (SFX), and then you ‘re all clean and fresh. It’s spring. Life starts anew. ----

GK (SINGS DUET WITH BEAR):
O what a beautiful morning
O what a beautiful day
I’ve got a wonderful feeling
Everything’s coming my way.

Old Sweet Songs: A Prairie Home Companion 1974-1976

Old Sweet Songs

Lovingly selected from the earliest archives of A Prairie Home Companion, this heirloom collection represents the music from earliest years of the now legendary show: 1974–1976. With songs and tunes from jazz pianist Butch Thompson, mandolin maestro Peter Ostroushko, Dakota Dave Hull and the first house band, The Powdermilk Biscuit Band (Adam Granger, Bob Douglas and Mary DuShane).

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